But: I 39-m. Cheerleader

Here is what people don’t understand about cheerleading: it is not a denial of intellect. It is a discipline of projection. You learn to count in eights while holding a flyer’s ankle. You learn to smile so wide your cheeks ache, even after you’ve dropped the stunt and your back hits the mat. You learn that timing is a kind of truth. You learn that loud is not the opposite of smart —sometimes, loud is the only way to be heard over the roar of a gymnasium full of people who have already decided you don’t belong.

After class, she asked what I wanted to write my final paper on. I said I didn’t know. She said: “Write about the magic. Write about what it costs to be the one who makes everyone else feel brave.” but i 39-m. cheerleader

So when I say “but I’m a cheerleader” now, I mean something specific. Here is what people don’t understand about cheerleading:

So I did. And for the first time, I wrote “I am a cheerleader” without the but . You learn to smile so wide your cheeks